She told me, "Probably just some yogurt." Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure I don't ejaculate yogurt.
and I have Palm Sunday.
But at least he is better off than the guy who was chased by a bus. That guy was tired.
I thought to myself. That's a funny way to start a conversation.
These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
A barber queue
Man: Good news first please, doc! Doctor: We’re naming a disease after you
It’s the only time I’m ever wanted
Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.
… but in the movies, he look like an Oldman.
because its hands were constantly touching its face
They all laughed at me and told me she is isn't real. Well Jokes on them because neither are they
The current version has a nasty virus
I went to 4 different ones and they all said insufficient funds…
So, if you look around and you don’t see the other 4 people, they’re out having fun without you.
Dad: "No the regular kind."
You'll have to Walkman.
A cowboy is captured by indians. The chief tells the cowboy they’ll grant 3 requests before they scalp him.
The cowboy thinks a minute then says, " I wish to say goodbye to my horse then to set him free." So they bring him his horse, he whispers in its ear then sets him off into the sunset. He tells the chief he needs to mull over the third request and the chief agrees to wait until sunset. As the sun dips in the sky, here comes the horse back, with a beautiful brunette in the saddle. "Is this your last request?" the chief asks. "Uh, no," says the cowboy. "My last request is to say goodbye to my horse once more." "Ok…" says the chief. The cowboy leans into his horses ear and hisses, "You idiot! I said 'Posse! Posse!"
I was really embarrassed when my wife walked in on me playing with my son’s train set by myself, so in a moment of panic, I threw a bed sheet over it…
I think I managed to cover my tracks…
In order to streamline my work from home process, I’ve hired my cat as a part-time advisor.User: My laptop won’t connect to the VPN.Me: Consults my advisorMe: Have you tried pushing it off of the table and onto the floor?
I said, "Yes, when I picked up the phone."