Crosspost from /funny
used his stimulus check to buy baby chickens. He got his money for nothing and his chicks for free.
I’m on season 6 and I’m not really sure what this show has to do with security
It writes other words too.
Are you having a crisis?
If generosity was the only criteria required for heaven all halogens would be in hell
It was a pane to replace.
Because of all the red flags.
Really, I was quite lucky my older brother told me about it.
The bartender says "how did you do that?"
How should I know. It’s not like I have 2020 vision.
a. 10,000 km/s b. 100,000 km/s c. d. 1,000,000 km/s
He walked into a bra…
I am starting to finally understand why navy captains go down with the ship
Incase they have to Draw blood.
…I can never tell if they’re joking or not.
It's still fowl language
So we can die in peace.
but no one will do it
so we started using lubricant
A baked potato.
This is as close as I could get.
One day little Billy approached Mr. Johnson's house and knocked on the door. After they exchanged a few pleasantries, little Billy asked Mr. Johnson, "Sir, I noticed ya got some milkweed growing in your backyard, mind if go back there and get some milk?" Amused by the request, Mr. Johnson replied, "Son, knock yourself out." knowing full well that he couldn't possibly get milk from milkweed. Sure enough, Billy came back to Mr. Johnson with 2 pails of milk. Little Billy thanked the now shocked and speechless Mr. Johnson and went on his way. The next day Billy knocked on Mr. Johnson's door again. "Afternoon Mr. Johnson, I noticed ya had some buttercups growing in your backyard, mind if I get some butter?" Curious this time around, Mr. Johnson replied, "Sure son, go right ahead." knowing full well he couldn't possibly get butter from a buttercup. Sure enough, Billy came back with 2 buckets of butter. Again, Billy thanked a now even more shocked and speechless Mr. Johnson and went on his way. The next day little Billy knocked on Mr. Johnson's door for a third time. Mr. Johnson, very intrigued by little Billy's strange requests eagerly greeted the young man. "How can I help you today son?" said Mr. Johnson. "Well sir, I noticed ya had some pussy willows growing in your backyar-" and before Billy could finish Mr. Johnson interrupted, "Hold on Billy! Let me go get my boots!"
We were able to lift his coffin.
But it didn't hurt, because it was a soft drink!
We have….a lot in common.
Because they use the metric system there, Miles.
Its a buccaneer
50¢ ft. Nickelback.