Donald and the Giant Impeach
It trained and trained, and finally went to try out for the koala national soccer team. And wouldn't you know it? It made the team! It was so excited. But the night before it's first big game… POOF! It turned into a giraffe. It got dis-koala-fied.
Something bad is going to happen, I can feel it.
I don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay you.
Neil before me.
A hoppo My 4 year old cousin thinks it’s the funniest thing in the world
There haven't been any posts all year! australia squad
But it is what is on the inside that counts.
He didn’t habanero
it’s more difficult to deter…gents
Jack goes to his buddy Bob and says … “I’m sleeping with the priest’s wife. Can you hold him in church for an hour after mass for me?”
The friend doesn't like it but being a buddy, he agrees. After mass, Bob starts talking to the priest, asking him all sorts of stupid questions, just to keep him occupied. Finally the priest gets annoyed and asks him what he's really up to. Bob feeling guilty, finally confesses to the priest… "My friend is sleeping with your wife right now, so he asked me to keep you occupied." The priest smiles, puts a brotherly hand on Bob's shoulder and says… “You better hurry home now, my wife died a year ago"
I'm asking for a friend.
A married man left work early on Friday and went out for a few drinks with the boys. Instead of going home, however, he ended up partying with them all weekend and spent his entire pay check.
When he finally returned home on Sunday, his wife was furious and berated him excessively. After a couple of hours of nagging and scolding, she asked him "How would you like it if you didn't see me for a couple of days?!?" "That would suit me just fine!!" the man said. Well…Monday went by, and the man didn't see his wife. Tuesday went by with the same result. Wednesday came and went and the man still hadn't seen his wife. Thursday, the swelling went down a bit and he could see her a little, just out of the corner of his left eye.
I went to the doctors recently He said: “Don’t eat anything fatty” I said: “What, like bacon and burgers?”
He said, “No. Fatty, don’t eat anything
The doctor says, “5 penises!? How do you pants fit?” The man replies “Like a glove.”
"Hey Adam, I have two new organs for you," said god "What are they?" Adam Replied "Well," said God, "We have a brain, which will let you make intelligent decisions and hold conversations with Eve." "That's Great!" Adam said, "What's the other one?" "That would be a penis," God replied, "It will let you make offspring to populate the Earth. However, there is one downside." Adam asked, "What is it?" "Well, I only have enough blood to let you use one at a time."
“Have you ever shoed horses before?” the blacksmith asked him. “No,” replied the Irishman, “but I did tell a donkey to fuck off once.”
Waitress says, “What can I get you, Hun?”
He yells,” Don’t do it, you have too much potential”
Stop school shootings
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Great food, but no atmosphere
Another great thing ruined by a period.