Firefox Crash Log
![The perfect Front-End — Back-End representation I found at this school [OC]](https://jokejet.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/QLEBy48-400x400.jpg)
I bought the world’s worst thesaurus yesterday.
Not only is it terrible, it’s terrible.
Due to the quarantine
I’ll only be telling inside jokes
No matter how popular they get
antibiotics will never go viral.
I made $60.25 sucking dicks last night
Dude 2: lol, who gave you the quarter? Dude 1 : they all did.
Why does it take a pirate so long to learn the alphabet?
Because he spends years at C!
I don’t trust people who draw…
They always seem sketchy.
Me: *slapping my older brother in the face with his own hand*
Me: stop hitting yourself haha, why do you keep hitting yourself Sister-in-law: crying is this why you wanted an open casket
7 dwarves in a bath and they all felt Happy
So Happy got out.
You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving
You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
I was thinking they should change the name of the wishbone to the Napoleon.
Because you pull the Bonaparte.
While most puns make me feel numb,
mathematics puns make me feel number.
So a naked woman walks into a bar and asks for a beer…
The bartender stares at her body from head to toe then serves her a beer. She drinks it and asks for another beer. The bartender stares at her for longer and serves her a second beer. The woman again drinks it and asks for a third beer. Then the bartender starts to look at her with an amused expression, until the woman says: — What, have you never seen a naked woman before? — That I have, miss. I'm wondering where you're keeping the money to pay for the beers.
Olympic Condoms. (NSFW)
A man was shopping in a nearby supermarket when he noticed a package that said "Olympic Condoms". He bought it, and told his wife about it. " – Olympic Condoms? What's so special about them?" " – They have 3 colors: Gold, Silver and Bronze." " – And what color are you going to wear tonight?" " – Gold, obviously!" " – Why not Silver? It'd be great if you came second, for a change."
r/im14andthisisdeep:
r/dadjokes: hello 14, hello deep, I'm dad
Pizza clerk: We have a special today – buy one pizza, get the second one free
Dad: Then we'll just have the second one !
Got a new job at Gatwick Airport. I patrol the runways on a horse and shoot down any illegal flying devices in the area.
I'll be known as The Drone Ranger.
![[Meme] Recursion in a nutshell](https://jokejet.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/y851a5t0yg341-400x394.jpg)
A man is staggering home drunk after last call. A policeman sees the man stumbling around and asks where he’s going.
“I’m heading to a lecture,” the man slurs in response. “A lecture?” the skeptical cop responds. “Who would be giving a lecture at this time of the night?” “My wife,” the drunk man answers.
How many Alzheimer’s patients does it take in to screw in a lightbulb?
To get to the other side
Pierre, a French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the river Seine. It’s a beautiful day and love is in the air, so Marie leans over to Pierre and says, “Pierre, kiss me!”
So, Pierre grabs a bottle of red wine and splashes it on Marie`s lips. “What are you doing, Pierre?” shrieks Marie. “Well, my name is Pierre, the French Fighter Pilot, and when I have red meat I like to have red wine!” His answer is good enough for Marie and things begin to heat up. So she says, “Pierre, kiss me lower.” Pierre rips off her blouse, grabs a bottle of white wine and starts pouring it all over her tits. “Pierre, what are you doing?” “My name is Pierre, the French Fighter Pilot, and when I have white meat I like to have white wine!” They resume their passionate interlude and things really steam up. Marie leans over once more and softly whispers into his ear, “Pierre, kiss me lower.” Pierre tears off her underwear, grabs a bottle of Cognac and sprinkles it all over her bush. He grabs a match and lights it on fire. Patting the flames out furiously, Marie screams, “PIERRE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!?” “My name is Pierre, the French Fighter Pilot, and when I go down, I go down in flames!”
My wife complains I don’t buy her flowers.
In all honesty, I didn’t know she sold flowers.
My son asked me what an updog was.
I told him it was an older version of a henway. “What’s a henway?” My son asked. “About 5 pounds” I replied.
Why did the can crusher quit his job ?
Because it was soda pressing
I didn’t eat anything other than brown bread for dinner…
That was my wholemeal…
Why didn’t Obi-Wan forgive Darth Maul for killing his master?
He wasn't willing to let Qui-Gons be bygones.
What does a clock do when it’s hungry?
It goes back four seconds.
Why are people in New York always so sad?
Because the light at the end of the tunnel is New Jersey
“Dad, can you do my math homework for me?” “No son, it wouldn’t be right.”
"Well, at least you could try."
I poisoned my wifes pita dip
The police charged me with hummus-cide
In Avatar, Aang is 112 years old
Some call him "Boomer Aang"
How do you get a farm girl to like you?
A tractor.
Me: Hi! Do you take walk-ins?
Cremator: What
Went swimming today. Took a pee in the deep end. Life guard noticed and started blowing his whistle.
I was so scared, I almost fell in.
I spent a few hours by my wife’s grave today
She thinks I'm digging a pond
The female janitor at my building asked if I would chill and smoke some weed with her
I said no thanks, I can't handle high maintenance women
