Found a fresh one
It’s a small scale operation.
Our helpline is open 24/7!
We never made it.
When will I get adult super vision?
The bartender brings the drink and the beer starts whining. "My life is terrible, Nobody likes me, The world sucks." The bartender replies "it's all in your head."
National Dyslexic association.
I am now in hot water with the Japanese mafia.
His career is now in ruins.
This invention was ground breaking
I didn’t say anything because he might take a fence
at a table a few feet away from me sneezed and her glass eye came out and I caught it. I handed it back to her and she popped it in and said thank you. She was a beautiful woman. Gorgeous face stunning body and a beautiful smile to boot. The woman of my dreams right in front of me. A few moments pass by and she comes up to me and asks for my number and I looked around the room. Surely she must’ve been mistaken. I said “ who me?!!!?” She said “yes of course you. I don’t usually do this kind of thing but you just sort of caught my eye.”
Her: What are you going to do when we see it? Me: We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.
I always knew he liked them young, but that is fucking ridiculous.
Grandpa was celebrating his 100th birthday.Everybody complimented him on how healthy, athletic and well-preserved he appeared.
"I will tell you the secret of my success," Grandpa said, "My wife and I were married 75 years ago. On our wedding day, we made a solemn pledge. Whenever we had an argument, or fight, the one who proved wrong would go outside and take a walk for 5 kms. Gentlemen, I have been walking in the open air day after day for some 75 years now." One friend further asked, ‘But your wife is also slim and energetic?’ Grandpa said, ‘that is another secret, my wife use to follow me behind checking whether I go for 5 kms or sit in a park!!!
I'm moving up in this world..
I said no. I can't deal with high maintenance women
Chances are he Israelite
I got thrown out of DisneyWorld for spreading my dead mother’s remains around the park. It was her dying wish.
The security guards said I probably should have cremated her first.
They had no chemistry 🥺
But that's comparing apples to oranges
To get its pedigree.
No text found
And I'll name the other "DupliKate"
The high C.
They have trouble sweeping..
But you can climate