A gallon of water. Butane is a lighter fluid.
It was about time too! badoom chaaaa
There would be mass confusion
If you take one out during class, everyone starts acting like your friend.
George was turning 90 this week and his friends thought of doing something special for him. So they planned to contact a high class Escort service and send him a nice surprise. On his birthday, around 9 pm, when he was alone at home, the doorbell rang. George thought – who could it be ? Then the doorbell rang again. He got up and walked up to the door. As he opened the door, he was greeted by this young bombshell blonde, donned in a sexy little red dress with matching red lipstick and red heels. As he says Hi, she replies – Are you George ? He says- Yes, I am. She says – I am from SuperSex. George pauses for a minute. And then says nonchalantly, I'll have the soup please.
I guess I'll have to hide it somewhere else now.
I thought to myself, that’s a little condescending.
Kid: "Is it real or fake?" Me: "Fake." Kid: "Of course, and what about the plant?"
I went to the doctors for the first time in a long while. He told me I had a piece of lettuce hanging out of my ass
I told him it’s just the tip of the iceberg
You could say he was bread for the job.
He was, without a doubt, the worst mechanic in the history of Luftwaffe
"Doctor," the embarrassed man said, "I have a sexual problem. I can't get it up for my wife anymore. "Mr. Garrett, bring her back with you tomorrow and let me see what I can do." The next day, the worried fellow returned with his wife. "Take off your clothes, Mrs. Garrett," the medic said. "Now turn all the way around. Lie down please. Uh-huh, I see. Okay, you may put your clothes back on." The doctor took the husband aside. "You're in perfect health," he said. "Your wife didn't give me an erection either."
It was a big success. Everyone came. You should have see her face.
7th grade World history class.
No text found
I was like, 0mg!
Your probably dyslexic.
It May, Fri 10 you
A panda walks into a bar and says to the bartender “I’ll have a Scotch and . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Coke thank you”. “Sure thing” the bartender replies and asks “but what’s with the big pause?
” The panda holds up his hands and says “I was born with them”
(excuse my grammar that should be a semi-colon)
He died of exposure.
But I know they won't work.
He didn't want to be spotted
I'll probably watch them all like that from now on.