Friend’s much-older husband seems to have a never-ending supply of these.
It was the least I could do to help.
To get some fresh beets.
The other guy is fine with it.
Thanks to him I did 89 push ups in 10 seconds.
Now I can play some hard rock.
They shake! Bwahahahahaha
Can’t say that I’m surprised.
I want the best bang for my buck
My illegal logging business is a success
You're an eighth theist
Politics means Many Bloodsucking Insects
Turns out he was just playing peek-a-boo ICU
Let's go ride bikes!
An udder failure
But the men are so polite, they only look at the covered parts.
One's a British WASP, and the other is a USB.
It's on paper view.
They picked pizza. Then I made tacos because they don't live in a swing state.
One day Temel, the truck driver, while driving down a hill realizes that his brakes are not working. The truck is going faster and faster, until he reaches an intersection. Temel looks around. On his right, there is a child; on his left, there is a bazaar with more than 100 people. As a “clever” man, Temel chooses to drive towards the child instead of the bazaar. However, the next day, newspaper headlines read “TEMEL DROVE HIS TRUCK INTO THE BAZAAR, 40 KILLED, 35 INJURED”. They ask Temel: “How come you commit such an act?” Temel answers: “Everything happened when the child started to run towards the bazaar”.
Before long an old man approaches him with an old lamp. “Excuse me sir, would you like to buy this very rare lamp?” “For how much?” The businessman asks. “1.5 billion dollars. A steal, if you ask me. It is worth much more” The old man says. “1.5 BILLION DOLLARS?!” The businessman shouts, getting angry at the audacity of the old man, but the other interrupts him. “I understand your thoughts” the old man says quickly, “ but you see, this is a magic lamp. It has a genie inside it. Three wishes per person, no less!” “Oh, really? Show me, then” The businessman says mockingly. “Well, of course. I saved my last wish just for this” the old man smiles as he rubs the lamp. To the businessman’s surprise, a genie really pops out! “What is your third wish, master?” The genie says majestically. The old man grins at the businessman’s mesmerized face before making his last wish. “A mug of coffee, please.” The genie snaps his fingers, and a mug of coffee appears before the old man. The businessman stares slack-jawed at the mug as the genie disappears. The old man smiles. “Well?” “I’ll buy it” The businessman replies immediately, writing him a cheque, taking the lamp and leaving before the old man can change his mind. After getting home, the businessman runs the lamp hopefully, and sure enough, the genie appears. “What is your first wish, mas-” The genie starts, before being interrupted by the businessman. “I wish for all the money I gave the old man, as well as a new yacht, a mansion and a limousine!” The businessman blurts out quickly. The genie stares at the businessman for a few seconds, then says awkwardly: “M-my apologies master, I only serve coffee and tea.”
…if it were served warm, it would be justwater…
One, we are efficient and devoid of humor
The last thing we need is more plastic in the ocean.
The same thing Arkansas!
I call it my Trail Mix.
I know, it sounds a little far fetched.
You give it Sheep PR
So I made her stand in front of a deep fat fryer.