Go Sickle Mode
Well, the joke is on them. Because so are they
He would boldly go where no man had gone before.
…is it still stationary?
It was a #2!
She thinks I'm following or even stalking her, she is worried that I may be obsessed with her and any time she hears a noise in her house she is…purified? Oh, wait: petrified. Sorry, it's not easy reading a diary through binoculars from a tree.
is sphere itself
Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
So I packed up my bags and right
It's not stroganoff.
I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey
Because she couldn’t control her pupils.
Well, a dad joke meets yo momma joke and then they knock knock.
He bought some whiskey, and tequila When he got home, he set them on the table His son immediately picked up both bottles The dad asks "What are you doing?!" The son responds "You were sad, so I'm lifting your spirits"
You use spring water.
He won the no-bell prize
I can't believe I never mentioned herbivore.
Everyone’s looking down, nobody’s making eye contact, and my penis is exposed.
The mother smiles a replies: "Once upon a time, me and your daddy had a wonderful time so we decided to plant a little seed. Daddy put it in the earth and I took very good care of it every single day. After a while the seed started to grow more and more leaves and in a few months, the seed turned into a beautiful and healthy plant. So we took the plant, dried it, smoked it and then we got so high that we fucked without a condom."
And at the end of each weekend, there is a Brother that goes around to all the casinos to cash them out and make a deposit. He's the Chip Monk.
Because he was too far out
Or should I spread them apart
I hope she gets the message that we’re not working out.
A vicious circle.
To save his business, my butcher is trying an experimental process where he gives his cows magic mushrooms before slaughtering them.
Let's just say…the steaks are high.
She wouldn’t get her nose out of my business. I was nuts over her though
He's a Cairo-practor…
Unfortunately when I went to get it back, they were shut down for money laundering.
Me from the other room, "No, use a toothbrush".
Well I know that. How else could you sell it?
A woman is sitting at her deceased husband’s funeral. A man leans in to her and asks, “Do you mind if I say a word?”.
“No, go right ahead.” the woman replies. The man stands, clears his throat, says “plethora”, and sits back down. “Thanks”, the woman says, “that means a lot.”
But that was Ear-Elephant.
One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sunk to the bottom and stayed there. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out. When the medical director became aware of Mary's heroic act he immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as he now considered her to be mentally stable. When he went to tell Mary the news he said, "Mary, I have good news & bad news. The good news is you're being discharged because, since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you've regained your senses. The bad news is, Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom. I am so sorry, but he's dead." Mary replied "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry."