HAHAHAHAHA FUNNY FUNNY FAMILY GUY MEME
It was all bark and no bite.
No wonder we're all terrified of clowns
It’s a fizzician! I’ll see myself out
I think the paper is jamming.
Me: "Why?" Bouncer: "I have no idea who you are and this is my trampoline."
No text found
… because Dawn is tough on Greece.
“What are those knives doing in your car? Asked the officer. “I use them in my juggling act,” says the juggler. “Oh yeah?” “Let’s see you do it.” Says the policeman. So the man starts tossing and juggling the knives. A guy driving by sees this and says, “Wow, am I glad I stopped drinking. Look at the test they’re making you do now!”
But later on they grew on me
"Thanks for the warning, officer."
…5,6,7,8 I use this hand to masturbate.
At first, I thought she was joking. But then I saw her face…
A man was shopping in a nearby supermarket when he noticed a package that said "Olympic Condoms". He bought it, and told his wife about it. " – Olympic Condoms? What's so special about them?" " – They have 3 colors: Gold, Silver and Bronze." " – And what color are you going to wear tonight?" " – Gold, obviously!" " – Why not Silver? It'd be great if you came second, for a change."
In my heart, he'll always be a wiener
Just the other day I woke up to my beautiful and loving wife holding a pillow tightly over my face to protect me from the coronavirus.
And when the donation tin is makes it's way to the gay man, he leaves a $1000 in the tin. Once the tin makes it's way back to the pastor, the pastor is shocked! He yells, "Whoever left such a generous donation, please make yourself known!". The gay man stands up and says "I did". The pastor smiles at the man and says, "This church thanks you for such a gift! The congregation would love for you to choose 3 hymns". The gay man starts pointing around the church and saying "I will take him, and him and him!"
They're lo mein tenants.
I don't know, they just ransomware.
and I've already got a friend in me.
Shockly shocks users into self-improvement. Homeroom Homies beloved jails will be the new college. Introducing Special Situations, the first blog focusing on entrepreneurs in post-moral markets.
Special Situations explores nascent opportunities in markets defined by post-moral dynamics. A market is “post-moral” if participants claim to be agnostic about how I’m their products or used, or the consequences of their use, but rely on the product to be used immorally to profit.Each post interviews a founder operating in a post-moral space.Our first interview was with Preston Everblue, founder of Homeroom Homies, who believes prison will be the new college.Homeroom HomiesOur first interview was with Sarah Dermer, founder of Shockly, who believes calibrated shocks delivered through special glasses can encourage self-improvement — within bounds agreed to be corporate partners. ShocklyPlease sign up! [special situations ](specialsituations.substack.com)If you don’t like emails, follow me, Chad Lin, on Twitter @thechadlin.
A Russian, a Frenchman and an Englishman argued about Adam's nationality. The Frenchman said, "Of course Adam was French. Look how passionately he made love to Eve!" The Englishman said, "Of course Adam was British. Look how he gave his only apple to the lady, like a real gentleman." The Russian said, "Of course Adam only could be Russian. Who else, possessing nothing but a sole apple, and walking with a naked ass, still believed he was in a paradise?"
Nobody expects "The Spanish Inquisition".
Because without that, what else is there to destroy?
Friend- "That's not true, there is no such law anywhere in middle east". Me- "Yeah, but you need to be above 13 to use Facebook".
He chose the electric clippers, but I got the straight blade. Despite being twins, we were razed differently.
These days, people will click on anything even if it's nothing more then a catchy title
I bet their wings would taste delicious!
But on the plus side,…it still works.
They were sole mates
He responded, “can’t complain.”
Because if they swam in peppered water they’d sneeze all the time.
Look for the Fresh Prints
Me: thanks for reminding me
I believe it's best to let the doctor do it.
A good party wasn't the correct answer, apparently.
A mexican woman walks into a car dealership and starts looking at a car. A salesman asks if she needs any help or got any questions.
Her: Cargo space? Salesman: Car no do that. Car no fly.
I’m going to start taking steps to avoid them.