How did Jesus stay in such great shape?
I can’t even remember why I was carrying it around
It’s a fizzician! I’ll see myself out
It's ridiculous and unfair. Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest country.
They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works. 😀
Go Team Telescope!
Don’t worry, she’s in stable condition.
Some tourists in the Museum of Natural History are marveling at some dinosaur bones. One of them asks the guard, "Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?" The guard replies, "They are 65,000,011 years old." "That's an awfully exact number," says the tourist. "How do you know their age so precisely?" The guard answers, "Well, the dinosaur bones were sixty five million years old when I started working here, and that was eleven years ago."
Then I could sleep longer.
God my ankle hurts this morning.
Don't worry, he's 0K
Bought a bing. Bought a boom.
It went back for seconds
"All this LGBTQ shit is getting out of control. It wasn't like this when I was a little girl."
A vaccum cleaner.
The doctor takes one look at him and says, “Well, I can clearly see your nuts.”
Hitler says "Yes." Stalin then says "Moscow." Hitler replies with "I don't get it?" Stalin laughs and says "And you never will."
It may, Fri 10 you.
When the Pope answers the door, Dopey steps forward and nervously asks "Your Excellency, I wonder if you could tell me if there are any dwarf nuns in Rome?" "No Dopey, I don't think there are," the Pope replies. The other six dwarfs start to giggle. "Well, are there any dwarf nuns in Italy?" Dopey persists. "No, none in all of Italy," the Pope answers more sternly. The dwarfs begin to laugh even more. "Are there any dwarf nuns in Europe?" This time the Pope is much more firm. "Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in Europe." By now, the other dwarfs are laughing aloud. "Your Excellency," Dopey demands. "Are there any dwarf nuns in the whole world?" "No Dopey, " the Pope snaps. "There are no dwarf nuns anywhere in the world!" The six dwarfs start jumping up and down, chanting "Dopey fucked a penguin! Dopey fucked a penguin!"
His name was Rick O'Shea
I'm sure he's going to treat her well, I heard they worship cows.
Christmas is coming
I said "I know, they came out of the closet this morning".
He couldn't see that well.
It has a ring to it.