The boy says, "Me ma is dead." "Oh bejaysus," the man replies. "Do you want me to call Father O'Riley for you?" The boys says, "No tanks mister. Sex is the last thing on my mind at the moment."
I mean… how low can you get!
JOB AT GOOGLE FROM UZBEKISTAN! VERY FAST!SUPPORT ME ON MY JOURNEY!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yW4pZq_LMYQ&t=2s&ab_channel=tenten
He tells you his name is Terry. You laugh at him and say"That's a girl's name!" Terry shoots you. You have died of dissin' Terry.
The mirror: you should see yourself right now The echo: meh, I've heard it all before.
I thought,wow, that's pretty big
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But they couldn't be more wrong. So far I've made two jugs and a vase.
Remains to be seen.
Someone is gonna die, I can feel it.
I guess she found out about me and the babysitter.
Because if they slept with both legs up they would fall over. My 14yo daughter just dropped this one on us.
[True story] My Grandma and Grandpa were arguing. My grandpa exclaimed, “I’m the King, and you’re nothing!” So my Grandma replied…
“Oh yeah? Then you’re the King of nothing!”
My computer crashed and I lost all the notes I’d saved for the book I’m working on called ‘1,001 cures for itches.’
I guess I'll have to start again from scratch.
Step 1, Step 2, Step 4, Step 9, Step 22, Step 23,
Because they lactose.
So I added some fruit and lemonade to it, and now she sangria than ever.
The Brexit – you promise to pull out but you don’t
right where it hertz.
She seemed surprised.
Well, after 10 years your Job still sucks.
That makes him Postponed Malone.
It was pretty cool, she even recommended some girls I might like to sleep with next
His hand caught fire
A student visits the principal’s office one day and the principal says to him, “What’s your name, son?” He replies: “D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir.” The principal looks up and asks him, “Oh, do you have a stutter?”
The student replies, “No sir, my dad has a stutter, but the guy who registered my name was an asshole.”
We just clicked.
Now they have to yell "Donald, Duck!"
Well of course Dad jokes! Dad is hilarious!
Go Team Telescope!