I could watch this all day.
Well, it's 2:30 now and she hasn't walked at all
Me: thanks for reminding me
But it's actually because they're dead
The correct term is turd-world countries.
It made me sad, because I knew it was bread in captivity.
My dad (67) just sent this to me. It’s literally a dad joke. Some of us might not get it though I’m sure.
What does the Pink Panther say when he knocked over an ant hill? Dead ant… dead ant… dead ant dead ant dead ant… dead ant dead ant….
I had to draw my own conclusions.
Because it keeps Dublin.
You can’t tell me that’s just a coincidence.
Not having potatoes.
you get them VERY ANGRY
They bring delight. My 7-year-old son told me this at the breakfast table this morning. He is going to be a great dad one day.
He's going to he'll.
But I’m 2² to say it
No text found
Now it's not a very beautiful poem… But it's quite deep
The psychiatrist says "Well I can clearly see your nuts"
The pharmacist replies “are you really going to need 3?” The young lad says “yeah, I’ve got a meal at my girlfriend’s place tonight and I think her mum and her sister both fancy me so I’m gonna smash all three of them, they’re really sexy!” The pharmacist gives him the condoms and says “lucky you!” Later that night, the young lad is sat at the dinner table with his girlfriend and her mum and sister when her dad comes in and sits down at the table. The young lad sinks into his chair and starts to pray. The girlfriend says “I didn’t know you were religious.” The young lad replies “I didn’t know your dad was a pharmacist!”
But the reception was incredible!
Look for fresh prints.
I went to the opticians and they were telling me about revolutionary technology to allow us to see out of different parts such as our arms, nose and even our ass. Intrigued, I asked "when will this technology would be available?" The optician replied "arm and nose is coming in 2019, hindsight is 2020"
A rip off.
You’re still using fowl language.
Well, technically it’s only a murder if there’s probable caws.
It's like he blew up overnight.
You have $400, your daughter text she needs $200, and your son text he needs $150. How much do you have left?
Me: $400 and 2 unread messages.