I hate allergies, they suck.
"Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?" Michael said: "Just a minute I have to go pee." The teacher responded by saying: "That would be rude and impolite. What about you Sherman, how would you say it?" Sherman said: "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back." "That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?" Johnny said: "I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, who I hope to introduce you to after dinner."
Number One with a Pullet.
I avoid meet.
It's been making headlines
I don't see anything funny there.
One day, someone asked him where the medical building was, Fred replied, "it's over there and to the left. I do research on the brain in there." Fred is an expert on the hippocampus.
Anyone have any tips?
he'll be born in may.
Then it dawns on me
He can’t keep the lilies alive.
Thank god I'm good at math, Truth = Life – God
Do you know 1 Comment 1 Upvote will empower your body and you will able to fly in the future
And to hell with anyone who doesn’t believe me.
Not sure why he hates bees so much.
I don't know and I don't care.
One is a superhero, the other is a command.
Dad: "'Yes' or 'no'."
But look at me now, I'm saving the world.
But it’s definitely up there.
But none of them work.
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas
WiiU! WiiU! WiiU! WiiU! WiiU!
My kids are upset about that decision.
Driving home from my family's Christmas party. Daughter – Dad, on Friday I need some French fries. Me – confused..why?? Daughter – because it's Fry-day. So proud.
Communication is key
Because they’re always stuffed.
Until I drove pasta
I haven't cleaned it, but I have had time.
They said the customers complained about my hanging dick
Which side of the mic the depressed people are on.