I hate jokes about infinity
They always take forever to say…
When it's full groan
I was in the park today when a woman came up to me and said, “Are you taking photos of my daughter on your iPhone?”
“Yes I’m taking photos of her,” I replied, “But it’s not what you think.” “So what is it then?” she asked. I said, “Its a OnePlus.”
It's a virus wich deactivates your spelchek and fcuks up you riting. I receibed it but lukily I don't wach p0rn so I dint opin it. Plees warm you frends Wanks
But I’m 22 to say it 🙁
She said "Fuck you". So I'm pretty excited for 2019.
So I let him drive it from time to time
Olive the other reindeer!
She was seeing other people
A man walked into the produce section of his local supermarket and asked to buy a half head of lettuce.
The boy working in that department told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce. The man was insistent that the boy ask his manager about the matter. Walking into the back room, the boy said to the manager, "Some butt- hole wants to buy a half head of lettuce." As he finished his sentence, he turned to find the man standing right behind him, so he ……….added, "And this gentleman kindly offered to buy the other half." The manager approved the deal and the man went on his way. Later the manager said to the boy, "I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier. We like people who think on their feet here. Where are you from, son?" " Georgia , sir." the boy replied. "Well, why did you leave Georgia ?" the manager asked. The boy said, "Sir, there's nothing but whores and football players down there." "Really?" said the manager. "My wife is from Georgia ." "No shit?" replied the boy. "Who'd she play for?"
I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day.
Even their cakes are in tiers.
now the amount of girls I made wet this year is -1. 🙁
Carrots may be good for your eyes but booze will double your vision.
Wanna go ride bikes?
I had some big shoes to fill.
So one Nun can make sure that the other Nun doesn't get none.
So I packed up my stuff and right.
You can only ran through a campground, because it's past tents.
Is like continuing from someone else’s saved game
A so-be-it union.
I guess shift happens.
Because they get to switch sides halfway through.
"In these troubled times, the steaks have never been higher."
He misses you.
I've been living here for 300 years and i havnt noticed shit.
Now I’m in hot water with the Japanese mafia…
Anna 1 Anna 2
But when I got home, they were still there.
Because camping is in tents.
I'm moving up in this world..