I really tried
I like using zoom for immunology, because I can make things like this during class.
https://ift.tt/2SjV8b3
Why is getting broken up with like doing algebra?
You've got an ex, and you're trying to figure out why.
My wife’s dog died. Soto cheer her up I bought her another one just like it. …
She was furious. “What am I going to do with two dead dogs?” she said.
I didn’t always want a brain transplant,
but then I changed my mind.
What type of shoes do pedophiles wear?
White vans
A telescope turned up in our lost and found box
We don’t know who it belongs to, but we’re looking into it.
A man and his wife are in bed, the man is really horny and wants to have sex, but the woman just wants to read her book, so she refuses.
the man, frustrated, jumps out of bed and goes down to the basement, and when he returns to bed, he's holding a sheep. The man says "this is the pig i cheat on you with when you're busy" . the women looks at him and says "honey, that's a sheep in your hands". The man turns to her and says " I wasn't talking to you".
My friend Jay recently had twin girls, and wanted to name them after him.
So I suggested Kaye and Elle.
My wife said I had no sense of direction…
So I packed my bag and right
I’d like to start dieting…
…but I just have too much on my plate right now.
If money doesn’t grow on tree’s….
Then why do banks have so many branches?
If three is company;
Four is an unpaid intern.
I was once attacked by a group of mimes.
They did unspeakable things to me.
Why do seagulls travel over the sea?
Because if they traveled over the bay, they’d be bagels
How do you make a waterbed more bouncy?
You add Spring water.
I don’t often tell Dad jokes.
But when I do, he laughs.
Dads are like boomerangs
I hope.
Did you hear about the day the cows ran away?
It was udder madness
![[OC] Reminding coworkers to test their code be like…](https://jokejet.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/11/s4sh9q23eaz31-400x338.jpg)
How do you check if a sniper loves you?
He misses you.
My girlfriend changed a lot after she became vegan.
Its like I've never seen herbivore.
To the person who stole my glasses
I will find you. I have contacts.
Why did the cows return to the marijuana field?
It was the pot calling the cattle back.
My ex just donated her eggs and got $3,000! WTF?
I donated sperm and all I got was a weird look from the Salvation Army Santa.
I spent a summer working on a rabbit farm…
It was a hare raising experience…
Two lesbians go on a date, who pays for it?
The guys that think they're on a double date
