If you choke an ankle, you’ve hit the bottom wrung.
Because in the end, they’re all wieners.
Well of course Dad jokes! Dad is hilarious!
Librarian: I’m sorry, I don’t think it’s in yet. Me: Yeah, that’s the one.
But its harder to deter gents
Day 2 of wfh and things are getting pretty weird. The guy I’m supposed to pair with gets pretty annoyed if I don’t pay him attention, but most of what he says about my code is unintelligible. He also seems to never get past the login screen on his computer. I don’t think he’s getting any work done.
A lot of conditioning
Anna 1 Anna 2 Anna 3 Anna 4
Cause truants don't go to school! (I came up with this right now)
My girlfriend is fed up of my constant wordplay jokes, so I asked her, “How can I stop my addiction?”
"Whatever means necessary," she replied. "No it doesn't." I said.
50 cent featuring Nickelback
Hey, haven’t we metaphor?
You boil the hell out of it.
Me trying to sound intelligent: " Well, China is 3.7 million square miles. "
She said yes, all the others had been nines and tens
I have no words to describe how angry I am.
It's amazing what 7 jokes can do
“In English, a double negative forms a positive. But in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, in no language in the world can a double positive form a negative.” But then a voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”
Those are the pie rates of the Caribbean
In charge of the schedule Yoda was.
He regretted not passing the bar.
I'm fine – i only suffered super fish oil injuries
But everyone’s cool about it and he’s served his drink. Then, after a few minutes he says, “Hey, bartender; wanna hear a blonde joke?” The place goes dead still. Finally the bartender says, “Look, mister, I know you’re visually challenged and all; I’m gonna cut you some slack. But there’s a few things you should know. “Sitting next to you, on your right, there’s an off-duty cop. She’s armed, and she’s a blonde. On your left you got a martial arts expert with black belts in seven different disciplines. She’s a blonde. At the table behind you, two sisters: a professional wrestling team. Both are blondes. And me, I got a .357 Magnum under the counter. I’m licensed, trained, and it’s loaded. And, you guessed it: I’m a blonde. “So I want you to choose your words carefully before you answer this question: do you still want to tell that blonde joke?” “Aw hell no. Not if I have to explain it five times!”
He never returned and the world ran out of milk.
Oh wait nvm, she's back. Just went to go to the bathroom.
I will find you, you have my word
She ran away from the ball.
They'll get over it.
My life is a joke.