It absolutely is
They dont like getting roasted
This is going to be one hell of a week.
Vehicular man’s laughter.
Because he was told to get a long little doggie.
I just sang about eight bars.
"Do you smell carrots?"
Just stop giving a shit
Because it’s cheaper…
… nah, I shouldn’t spread it around
If Phoenixes can fly why is he Joaquin?
"I’ve just had sex education in school today, Dad! You lied to me! You told me if I have sex before marriage, my boyfriend will die!" I put down my paper: ‘Oh, he will, sweetheart, he will.’ ”
He chose the electric clippers, but I got the straight blade. Despite being twins, we were razed differently.
In the Ark hives.
You’ll all be seeing 2020
It's all about raisin awareness
People were lined up for blocks
Instead of a swear jar, I have a negativity jar. Every time I have pessimistic thoughts, I put a dollar in…
It’s currently half empty…
It was SpaceXXX.
Vladimir Putin was practicing a eulogy speech for an assassinated Russian politician in front of a mirror…
(ahem!) "He was a dear patriot and credit to the Motherland, whom I personally adored as a friend and colleague. I vow, as leader of Russia, to find the culprits responsible for this vicious murder…" Putin then stopped and turned to his aide. "Are you sure this strikes the right tone, Yuri? I mean, in terms of timing? I've been a bit preoccupied, so remind me, when was he killed?" After a few moments consulting his ipad, the aide replies, "Next week, sir."
Because they’re full of Arab semen.
You can't hear an enzyme.
When a short person waves at you, it's called a microwave
Then I realized I hadn't turned the TV on.
It was on its last legs.
A black hole walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks if it would like food with that. The black hole says, "No thanks, I'm a light eater."
I told her I already Reddit.