“Made with mematic”
and gave her fifth grade class a challenge to spell any 12 letter word. One kid raised his hand and the teacher called on him. "M-A-S-T-U-R-B-A-T-I-O-N," he spelt. The whole class laughed and the teacher was quite taken aback, but nevertheless congratulated him as it was a 12 letter word and he did manage to spell it correctly. "Wow!" she said. "Well done. That's quite a mouthful!" The kid replies, "No, you're thinking of a blowjob!"
But it’s been a week and I just keep getting hungrier.
If you have to force it it’s probably shit.
Her: What are you going to do when we see it? Me: We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.
Well, that's close but no Seger. Old time rock and roll never forgets.
What's even better is, she thinks it's punishment.
Because it’s sitting in the middle of the AC
I can never get a straight answer
No? SO IT WAS YOU!!!
“No son, have you seen my dad glasses?”
…it sounds like putting a shell to your ear.
I told him “I don’t. But i guana learn someday”
The protests in Hong Kong have been continuous for 160 days, proving the country does not belong to China.
Because nothing made in China has ever lasted more than a week.
The kids are taking it pretty hard.
Call the swat team.
He tractored down.
That makes him Postponed Malone.
The rotation of the earth
She has the world worst stutter.
I’m very sad but I gotta say it’s a big weight off my shoulders
One says to the other "Does this taste funny to you?" The other says "No"
Number one, and number two
They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works. 😀
He can’t keep the lilies alive.
She couldn’t see that well
they'd eventually find me attractive.
During the funeral, his mother walks towards the director and says, "Jesus died for your scenes."
Good players are hard to find.
Dad: okay, you're an ambulance
…that he had made the world’s flattest, blandest dough. To that I responded, “Prove it then!”