It scares the dog.
My wife went to get a pedicure with her mother. She sent me a text saying that they have an exfoliating, foot scrub that has CBD/Hemp oil in it and she was going to try it out…I replied “baby, do you realize that you left the house with slippers on…
But you are coming back with high heels”. Her mom sent me a text asking me what I said that made my wife throw her phone in to her lap and groan aloud. Mission accomplished haha
You’re walking along the Oregon Trail and you meet a guy named terry. You laugh at him as say Terry is a girls name. Terry shoots you. You’ve died of dissen terry.
When the punchline becomes apparent.
Cop looking for a bunch of hardened criminals.
Crap! I mean dyslexia
Because he conditioned it.
Old hobbits die hard.
So I told her she's pretty enough.
Husband: Emphatic no, 5 letters. Wife: Never. Husband: Pistol, 3 letters. Wife: Gun. Husband: Disgust, 3 letters. Wife: Ugh. Husband: Charity, 4 letters. Wife: Give. Husband: Female sheep, 3 letters. Wife: Ewe. Husband: Pixar movie, 2 letters. Wife: Up.
They both go broom broom
No strings attached.
In fact, I think I'm gonna rub one out
No text found
Because no one wants a blowjob from a girl when her teeth are chattering.
But then I realized that’s just nuts…
My son's shit drawing of a snake.
And its called "Fast Ten, Your Seatbelt"
It’s ok though. Wasn’t my relationship.