nO nO hE’s GoT a PoInT
I am not poking fun at anyone for being lower income, you can tell by the picture it’s a nice home. But in my search for a home I found this house and their master “bathroom” really sold me.https://imgur.com/j1345OnPlease post all potty IT jokes
…I can never tell if they’re joking or not.
To tell people he was a vegan.
He yells, "Goddamn it all to hell!" St. Peter hears him and asks God, "Aren't you going to do anything about that?" God says, "Yep." Next hole is a long par five over water ending in a dog leg. The guy tees up and crushes the ball. It hits the water but just as it does, a turtle surfaces. The ball bounces off the turtle's shell and gets another hundred yards. Just as its about to stop rolling, a squirrel runs over and grabs the ball before being immediately snatched by a gorgeous red tail hawk. The hawk flies him off and just over the green the squirrel drops the ball. The ball hits the green, rolls and falls in the hole. Most amazing par five hole-in-one in history. St. Peter, astonished says, "You call that punishment?" God replies, "Yep. There was nobody around to see it."
I just don’t know why.
It meant the world to me
Preferred pronouns are Her/she
Because then they wouldn't be single.
well i cant because he's not here
If you had called your search engine Bang instead of Bing, you'd have destroyed Google. What would you rather say? "I just Googled Rihanna"or "I just Banged Rihanna."
and then it hit me
But so far I've made 3 vases and a jug.
“Son”… “how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”
I said, "Take your phone off silent." That's when the fight started.
Then they call me ugly, and poor.
Moses. He could control sea.
Because travelling through time petrifies them!
MARIO : why Judge : it’s a fine MARIO : (sadly) no itsa not
This is going to be one hell of a week.
It’s considered to be a personal fowl.
Guess who came crawling back?
People from Dubai don't like The Flintstones but those in Abu Dhabi do.
DAD: "Poof, you’re a sandwich!”
We are all concerned for her health, Kevin.
“How long do you have to do that for?” I asked. “When is he too old for it?” “Well, it’s a physical bond between a mother and her child isn’t it? It’s only the society that deems it unacceptable above a certain age.” “Yeah, shut up Joe – I was talking to your mother.”
I learned next to nothing.
At the end of it, the person that ran the course said, "Ok, buddy, so for the week you owe me…£380." "I refuse to pay," I told him. "You have to," he insisted. "Well then, you'll have to fight me for it." So we fought, and he absolutely battered me. Left me bloody, bruised and beaten. He said, "£380. Cough it up." "No," I told him, wiping my lip. "Because it was clearly a waste of money."
but not the ones she’s been giving me lately.