So I packed up my stuff and right
It scares the shit out of their dogs.
I replied "no, you do" and unplugged his life support.
But I'm still not 100% shore
I only have my shelf to blame.
He pasta way.
Be prepared for the reaper cushions.
It's the first time they'll see 2020
The pessimist sees a tunnel. The optimist a light a the end of the tunnel. The realist sees a train…
The train engineer sees three idiots on the railroad tracks.
at the ol factory
…but the heavier ones need to be delivered by crane…
But ive choked a few cougars.
I must not be strogonough (strong enough)
The bartender says “I’ll have to see some id”.
He's only got little legs
We do it in schools because we have class.
the wedding wasn't much to speak of, but the reception was excellent.
I just think he’s mean.
So when they come back they can Scandinavian.
If I’m being objective, it’s Dr. Whom.
Easy. Good cops carry a Goodge.
I'll let you know.
Edit: Thanks for the gold!
Alpacastan! …I'm not sorry.
He then proceeds to pull out hundreds of pink valentine's day cards, write inside them and stamp them with "Love" stamps. He then pulls out a bottle of expensive perfume and spritzes each envelope. The bartender finally can't contain his curiosity and approaches the man. "You must have 500 or more cards there," the bartender says. "I've got to admit I'm curious what you're doing." "Oh, every year at Valentine's Day I send out 500 cards, each one signed 'Guess Who?'" the guy says. "But why?" the bartender asks. "I'm a divorce lawyer," the guy replies.