Oh wow, I had no idea!
He ate the pizza before it was cool.
It’s the only time I’m ever wanted
Because he doesn’t want to be spotted.
A plain bagel.
Cu Tips of to my classmate for telling me this
My wife asked me whether my friends and I experimented with drugs and sex when we were in high school.
I said, “Yes. But I was part of the control group.”
I don't think I can ever repay you.
he felt his presence
It’s amazing two me.
I'd probably get bronze.
Pun in, ten dead.
Wife: I'm pregnant. Dad: Hi pregnant, I'm dad. Wife: No you're not.
Me: That's a whisk I'm willing to take.
Then it would be a foot.
In little knotsies
A wife was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband’s key in the door. “Stay where you are,” she said. “He’s so drunk he won’t even notice you’re in bed with me.”
the husband lurched into bed, but a few minutes later, through a drunken haze, he saw six feet sticking out at the end of the bed. He turned to his wife: “Hey, there are six feet in this bed. There should only be four. What’s going on?” “You’re so drunk you miscounted,” said the wife. Get out of bed and try again. You can see better from over there. The husband climbed out of bed and counted. One, two, three, four. Damn, you’re right.
Wife: I have to tell you something. I'm pregnant. Husband: Hi Pregnant, I'm Dad Wife: No you're not.
The Living Room! Credit goes to this old man at my job. He's full of em.
It can write other words too.
The big ones at the end of the wing. These feathers are called pinion feathers. A crow has sixteen. So, the difference between a crow and a raven is only a matter of a pinion.
Free of charge.
I don’t want to make a spectacle of myself
It was a joint operation
Well, three can play that game!
But this year I've turned it around, I'm miserable and depressed