What is an unborn child’s favorite craft?
(In honor of my cake day, the one that makes my kids groan the most) When I die, I want to go like my grandfather: in my sleep.
Not yelling and screaming like all the other people in the car he was driving at the time.
A comic about friends
A man asked me why my clothes were gay
I said “Cause, they came out the closet”
Wholesome boomer humour
Putin on a trip.
Vladimir Putin is traveling abroad. He enters the customs line, approaches the agent and is asked: Agent: age? Putin: 66 Agent: occupation? Putin: not this time, just visiting.
Me in med school
A cute girl at work said she’d only go on a date with me on a day that doesn’t end in ‘Y’
I said "Great! I'll pick you up tomorrow!"
Shoutout to the reddit dev testing in production
Back to work!
I asked my wife if I was the only one she’s been with.
She said “yes, the others were at least eights or nines”
I’m the skinny white man
This could get interesting
A United States Marine was deployed to Afghanistan.
While he was there he received a "Dear John" letter from his girlfriend. In the letter she explained that she had slept with two guys while he had been gone and she wanted to break up with him. To add injury to the insult, she said she wanted back the picture of herself that she had given him. So the Marine did what any squared-away Marine would do. He went around to his buddies and collected all the unwanted photos of women he could find. In all, he got more than 25 pictures of various women (some with clothes and some without). He then mailed them to his now-former girlfriend with the following note: "I don't remember which one you are. Please remove your picture and send the rest back."
Boomers 2019 vs Boomers 2020
The electrons be vibin tho.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen.”
The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to the man next to her: “The driver just insulted me.” The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”
Why did the train go to the sauna?
To blow off some steam 🙅♂️🚂
When your toddler is in the middle of a full scale tantrum.
She should smile more
Prognostication at its best
At least label it correctly.
Why is gambling illegal in China
Because they hate Tibet
An airline pilot, who didn’t realize his microphone was live, said to the co-pilot:
"Man I could sure use a hot cup of coffee and a blow job from that red-headed flight attendant!" That statement was heard throughout the plane and the furious red-headed flight attendant unbuckled her seat-belt and stormed off toward the cockpit. Seeing this, a passenger shouts, "Miss! Miss! You forgot the coffee!"
Peeing yourself in public is like being in Love
Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth.
I saw a kidnapping
I decided to let him sleep
I don’t know if this is a repost but some boomer on a discord server posted this
This meme is cancer.
My grandparents have an interesting toilet paper roll
Are u winning?
Fire is destroying a world famous landmark in Paris right now.
And there’s notre dame thing they can do about it.
Dick pic fishing
What do you call Batman when he leaves church?
This is from my 23 year old boomer driend
how does Hitler tie his shoes?
He learned his lesson
My wife said I should take out the spider instead of killing it.
I'm glad I did. We went out. Had a few drinks. Overall good guy. He's a web designer.
My dad shared this on Facebook
interesting title here
For those who hate subtlety
I’ve dedicated my whole life to finding a cure for insomnia.
I won’t rest until I find it.
human verification to the next level
When I die, I’m donating my body to science.
It’s the only way I’ll ever get into medical school.
You can try to make it foolproof, but you’ll always find a bigger fool
I thought I could score higher if I stuck to textbooks, I’ll know soon if I was wrong
r/PoliticalHumor 2019 Best Of Awards!
It’s time for Reddit’s Best of 2019 Awards.What a year it’s been here in r/politicalhumor, thanks to everyone for participating.Make your nominations here and/or upvote your favorites.You are welcome to categorize your nominations, i.e:Best PostBest CommentBest of YearOnly one nomination per comment. Please do not nominate yourself. You may only nominate submissions made in 2019.This thread is set to contest mode which sorts comments randomly and hides vote scores. In January, the votes will be tallied and a results thread will be posted. We will give reddit gold to the top submissions!
All a hoax
Instagram is a goldmine of this shit
But that inflation rate doe…
My wife asked me “Is it just me or is the cat getting fat?”
Apparently "No it's just you" wasn't the right answer.
Not sure if meme but yeah.
It says ‘Quarantine day 10’
The Left is so sensitive.
It really is
My wife and I bought a water bed recently but ever since then…
…we’ve drifted apart.
This is me definitely
Is it bad this made me smirk
Docker sure is friendly
Just another corpse looting in game.
126.96.36.199 – the last dns resolver
I have been hinting to my wife that I want a Segway for my birthday.
But every time I bring it up, she smoothly changes the topic.
…hold up…boomer says Marriage Good???