so funny 😂😂
Dann kannst du ihn dir nur noch von der Ursula Leyen.
Oh shit thought this was google
My grandfather who used to tell me knock knock jokes from since I was very little told me his last joke before he past away. This is it…
Him: Knock Knock Me: Who’s there? Him: Howard Me: Howard who? Him: Howard you like to be knocking for a change? This joke really made me laugh and I thought I’d share it with all you.
But none of them work.
She sells Seychelles on the see-saw.
One night a viking named Rudolph The Red was looking out the window when he suddenly said "It's going to rain". His wife was confused and asked him "How do you know?" He looked at her and responded "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear." Edit: Oooh my first Silver, thank you very much whoever you are!
Turned on On my lap Virus free
One shoots and shoots and never hits, and the other hoots and hoots and never shits.
I don't listen and something else…
Because they can’t keep a straight face.
Now she just staring at the bushes confused wondering who said that.
They will be so disappointed when the finale is not a cliffhanger.
My dad died last year when my family couldn’t remember his blood type in time for paramedics to save him
As he died, he kept insisting for us to "be positive," but it's hard without him
After graduating from high school, my daughter moved away from home to study at university. She sent this letter home to me…
Dear Dad, University i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply ¢an't think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you. Love, your $usie. I immediately replied back… Dear Susie, I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh. Love, Dad
It’s all word of mouth…
But one look and I realised it was a small price toupee.
All the DNA matches and there's no dental records.
I said "Can we be friends with benefits?". She said "So, you just want sex?". I said "No, I want you to add me on your health insurance.".
About 1,375 olives are pressed in order to make 1 liter of olive oil, 8,435 sunflower seeds to make a liter of sunflower oil…
Don't even get me started on baby oil
Other than jumping to conclusions.
Now I’m in hot water with the Japanese mafia.
Unlock the punchline for $9.99.
I don’t know but a group of them is called a Senate.
An old lady dies and goes to heaven. She’s chatting with St. Peter at the pearly gates when all of a sudden she hears the most bloodcurdling screams.
"Don't worry about that," says St. Peter, "it's only someone having the holes put into her shoulder blades for wings." The old lady looks a little uncomfortable but carries on with the conversation. Ten minutes later, there are more loud and dreadful screams "Oh my God," says the old lady, "now what is happening?" "Not to worry," says St. Peter, "She's just having her head drilled to fit the halo." "I can't do this," says the old lady, "I'm going to hell." "You can't go there," says St. Peter. "You'll be raped and sodomized." "Maybe so," says the old lady, "but I've already got the holes for that.
Remove the p
if you haven’t botany
a pain in the ass
you woulda thought the whole thing was built on some Indian burial ground.
Cause they know he actually did it.
I refuse to go that level
Any more and it would be two farty…
They were actually cooked in Greece
Because Dawn is tough on Greece. 😆