Sorry for the low quality of the image
"No, but I told a donkey to fuck off once."
Because dogs can't whistle!
And now I'm no longer allowed in the library
Every time on person sneezes, 10 people around them shit themselves.
A father in law
No text found
Irishman got a job at the zoo, first week there, someone asked him “would you fuck the gorilla for £2,000?”
Irishman said "on three conditions, I don't wanna kiss it, I don't want any of my friends or relatives to find out, and give me a couple of months to get the money together".
Because Logan Paul left him hanging
Like no bell prize.
My dad died last year when my family couldn’t remember his blood type in time for paramedics to save him.
As he died, he kept insisting for us to “be positive”, but it’s hard without him.
It just doesn’t listen.
I said, “Yes, but I’m here to get whiskey instead.”
IT'S FUCKING r/aww
He just goes on forever
…but I stand corrected.
It was absolutely ribbiting
A time traveler walks into a bar.
It was just a pigment of my imagination.
But most just have 4.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean? Bob. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in front of the door? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a volcano? Anakin Skywalker
A synonym roll…
I’m a CASHEW!
No text found
I just can't think of one atm
It 100% totally work's now i don't give a fuck about that bitch.
Apparently “Fucking large ones” wasn’t an acceptable answer.
Because they're really good at it.
I asked who has papers and they all took off running
This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
The mother replies. Well, your dad and I took a little seed. We made a hole on the ground and covered it with earth. We watered it and took care of it. After some time, a plant came out of the ground and started to grow leaves. We took the leaves and smoked them and then we were so high that we fucked without a condom. And that's how you were born.
I had to fight my wife, two doctors, and a nurse to finally do it.
It’s a trap
BUT MY KEYBOARD WAS BROKEN.