TikTok bad, upvotes to the left
He orders everyone a round.
Son: They’re underwater Dad: How are they underwater Son: They’re below C level
I called work this morning and whispered, “Sorry boss, I can’t come in today. I have a wee cough.” He exclaimed, “You have a wee cough!?”
I said, "Really?! Thanks boss, see you next week!"
I thought, “I don’t have time for this shit.”
But it's a 35 minute walk from the pub to my house. The difference is staggering.
It was a little drum attic.
She was a Mathmachicken.
It's the first time they'll see 2020
So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian.
I wish I could post it in another subreddit
me: Herbert pregnant wife: but what if it’s a b- me: Himbert
I said "NO! IT MUST BE A TYPE-O"
But the day before was a Saturday.
Something bad is about to happen; I can feel it.
Said no one, ever
It’s gonna take me a while to get hard, I just got laid by this chick
Seriously, how low can you go?
But when I got home, the tables were turned…
A law suit
Got my dream job today. I get my own 200 thousand dollar company car and a corner window with a view of the city..
Being a city bus driver is a dream come true.
How could anyone stoop so low??
She said yes, all the others had been nines and tens
Because they can’t keep a straight face.
“Thank goodness,” he says. “It was imaginary.”