Toilet paper shortage is real :(
Me: Make up your mind.
It’s impossible to put down!
They don't wanna get ripped
A gorgeous blonde was walking past him, stopped for a second with a tang of pity in her eyes. “Have you ever had a hug?” She asked. “No.” So with an “aww”, she gave him a big hug. Two minutes later, another beautiful woman was walking past the man. “Aw look at you honey. Have you ever been kissed?” “No.” He says. She leans down and gives him a passionate kiss. Another few minutes pass and another stunning lady walks past. “Oh you poor thing…Have you ever been fucked?” “No.” “Well you will be soon, the tides coming in.”
"That makes two of us"
I said, not sure I haven't met everyone yet. She was not amused.
There's too much sax and violins
I don't see the use of water with holes
Apparently, Shatner panties wasn’t the best choice for a name.
Because you give me the same fucking shit, day after day!
You have my word
And I thought, “that’s just spam”.
Hold on, it's 900. Edit: No, wait, it's 500.
I then came in cider.
Guess who came crawling back?
His friend asks, "Who?"
He needed to cool the crust, so he put it on the mantle.
No text found
Nothing…. it just let out a little wine.