what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile?
“robin, get in the batmobile”
But don't worry, I'm 0K.
he won the no-bell prize!
Rebrand it as a rap song and name it, "Yo Bitch, It's Freezing Outside."
Does he have no Seoul
You don’t know what you’re missing.
A priest, a pastor and a rabbi walk into a bar and soon begin arguing over who’s the best at what they do. Eventually they decide that in order to prove who’s the best, they would all go out alone into the woods and convert a bear to their respective religion. A few weeks later.. they meet up at the bar and the priest announces, "I found a bear by the river and started talking to him about the Lord. He liked it so much that he now comes to mass every week." The pastor says, "Well, I saw a bear in the clearing. I started reading him the bible and he loved it so much that he is now going to be baptized in about a week." The priest and the pastor turn to look at the rabbi, who now has a broken arm, a fractured collarbone and several cuts and bruises. The rabbi says, "You know what, looking back, maybe I shouldn't have started with a circumcision."
To get to the other slide
"2 or 3" she replied. Probably explains why her marriage collapse
How in the world did I miss all the red flags?
It hasn’t come out yet!
Me: I've seen this before. Whatever I wish for will come back and bite me in some way. Genie: I promise that won't happen. I'm so sure it won't I'll give you infinite wishes if it does. Me: Okay. I wish for a boomerang with teeth. Genie: You son of a ……..
it’s more difficult to deter…gents
A spelling bee!
As I slipped my finger slowly inside her hole, I could immediately feel it getting wetter and wetter…
I slid my finger back out, and within seconds, she was going down on me. I thought to myself, "I really need a new fucking boat."
The boy says, "Me ma is dead." "Oh bejaysus," the man replies. "Do you want me to call Father O'Riley for you?" The boys says, "No tanks mister. Sex is the last thing on my mind at the moment."
His parents go to a plastic surgeon and the surgeon finds out the boy hasn’t been circumcised yet. The foreskin has nearly the same tissue as the eyelids, so the surgeon suggests a procedure using the baby’s foreskin to fix this problem. Ecstatic, the parents agree. After a few hours of surgery, it was a success! The boy is fine now, he’s just a little cock-eyed.
You can only tolerate your own
He was in Daniel.
…and then I saw her face…
He has selfie steam problems.
A dad joke. How did I do?
He came, he saw, he conquered
Batman doesn't want to get shot. Why does Robin wear bright clothing? Batman doesn't want to get shot.
She replies, "Well, to be honest, at that price, the answer would have to be yes." "Well would you do it for five dollars?" "NO! What do you think I am?" "We've already established what you are. Now we're just haggling over price."
But when i do, he usually laughs
A can't opener.
I told him I thought the CIA was listening. He laughed. I laughed. Amazon Echo laughed.