Why do pirates love this subreddit?
It be the best place to exchange stolen content for gold.
Because if it were served warm, it would be justwater.
An old lady dies and goes to heaven. She’s chatting with St. Peter at the pearly gates when all of a sudden she hears the most bloodcurdling screams.
"Don't worry about that," says St. Peter, "it's only someone having the holes put into her shoulder blades for wings." The old lady looks a little uncomfortable but carries on with the conversation. Ten minutes later, there are more loud and dreadful screams "Oh my God," says the old lady, "now what is happening?" "Not to worry," says St. Peter, "She's just having her head drilled to fit the halo." "I can't do this," says the old lady, "I'm going to hell." "You can't go there," says St. Peter. "You'll be raped and sodomized." "Maybe so," says the old lady, "but I've already got the holes for that. Edit : I got a gold for a joke that I repost every month. Thanks person, hope you had a chuckle.
I call it the remorse code
José and Hose B
I found an alien masturbating in my freezer last night. I asked him what on earth he was doing in there.
He said, “I cum in peas.”
No text found
It's nice to have some company
Now she's a shovel
He was outstanding in his field.
Damn near poked my eye out.
Wife-Can you be serious for a minute? Me-*grins* Ok and you be Shirley Wife-I'm serious! Me-Shirley you can't be Serious, I'm Serious This actually happened. 🙂
please form an orderly orderly orderly queue.
When he arrives at the Pearly Gates, God is there to receive him. "Welcome. You are permitted to ask me one question, which I will answer truthfully." Without hesitating, the conspiracy theorist asks, "Who really shot Kennedy?" God replies, "Lee Harvey Oswald shot him from sixth floor of the Texas School Book Depository. There were no accomplices. He acted alone" The conspiracy theorist pauses, thinks to himself, then says "Shit! This goes higher up than I thought…"
Its what they call Ninjary time.
Now I’m clean
Donating 5 makes you a suspect
I'm not sure what scared him more. My naked body or the fact I knew where he lived
on a plane.
Because if they fell forward they would still be in the boat
a. 10,000 km/s b. 100,000 km/s c. d. 1,000,000 km/s
The captain was standing on the deck!
XL is bigger than L
They took him into custardy
I’ve been reading ‘Lord Of The Rings’ and apparently, Gollum was once a normal man, but wearing the ring drained him of his youth, energy and any joy in life…
Must be the same ring I put on when I got married…
The Chinese refuse to recognize Ty won.
She looked surprised.
You either have to put up with twice the number of Dad jokes, or you're stuck in an endless loop of "Go ask your mother".
To beat the crowd.
Because she went to woo Han.