Yes, you are.
but this isn't even my final form.
He speaks with the officer, who assigns him his post. “Go stand at the periscope entry-way, and make sure no unauthorized personnel touch the periscope.” The recruit follows orders, and stands by the periscope. After 15 minutes, the officer stops by. “Son I’m changing your post to the mess hall. Go in there and start washing some dishes.” The recruit obeys, and heads to the mess hall. He’s cleaned about 3 dishes when the officer walks up again. “Listen here recruit, your new post is in the supply room. I need you to make sure everything is strapped down tight, in case of rough waters.” The recruit again follows orders, and heads off to the supply room. There, he sees a crewman, moving some boxes. “Hey there,” says the recruit. “is it normal to keep getting reassigned to new posts all day? I haven’t kept one position for more than 15 minutes!” The crewman says “Oh yeah- this sub is full of reposts.”
…. when I thought "not only does my son have a really stupid name, he´s also a terrible driver"
“Sure,” said the dad “40.”
Friend: Congratulations! Do you know the sex? Me: Of course I know “the sex”. How else will she get pregnant?
With a pumpkin patch!
and sometimes Mayo neighs.
A shitty joke.
But that’s another storey.
2, 3, 5, and 7 are the prime suspects.
Outlaws are wanted.
Their words, not mine.
Did you know gibberish spelled backwards is gibberish? No, it's hsirebbig. Exactly my point!
A solid 10, but also imaginary.
I don't get it.
"I'm not Willie Nelson."
Dragon 1: It’s a bit hot in here Dragon 2: Shut your mouth
…after taking some time to size Jim up and decide that he can trust him, Carl tells Jim about his plan to escape. "You see, " Carl says "for the first 5 years I was inside, I trained my digestive system to follow my command. Now I can eat something and it comes out broken down into it's components." Jim is skeptical, but intrigued. Carl continues: "For the last five years, I've been swallowing pieces off my uniform. It's perfect, because the guards just think it's rats chewing on it." So Jim asks, "Well, what does that have to do with me? How can I help?" Carl says "Well, the pieces of fabric come out as individual fibers. I figure by this time next year, we'll have enough to fashion enough rope to get over the wall. I just need you to tie the fibers." Jim, disgusted, says "You have got to be kidding me!" And Carl says "I shit. You knot."
We get it man she’s underage
In the end you ignore it all and just click "I agree"
She said “yes, the others were at least eights or nines”
but none of them work.
Now it's just beer.
He pulled a muscle.
Click here to find out!
Sounds funny. Dozen tit.
It was a third degree burn…
My wife caught me standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in my stomach. “Ha! That’s not going to help,” she laughed.
“Sure, it does.” I said. “It’s the only way I can see the numbers.”