Yesterday I spotted an albino Dalmation.
It was the least I could have done for him.
I was addicted to soap
But now I'm clean
Shocked programmer tries to use an API designed by a Data Scientist
“I like your shoes”
It’s the little things
He showed up
How popular was FDR, the last “socialist” President?
Uncle coming through on Facebook
Wash Them Good
Dwight speaking the truth
You should never date someone with a lazy eye
They might be seeing someone on the side
The KKK reveals itself
Today, I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a wall.
As he turned and sneered at me, I thought, "that's a little condescending."
I was attacked by 1,3,5,7, and 9
The odds were against me
Aaaaah its hot
How to print new line in Spanish…
Karen and I had a blast
[SPOILER] Star Wars
Did you hear about the photographer who got lost in the woods?
He died of exposure.
Thought This belonged here.
Yesterday my doctor told me my chronic diarrhea is inherited.
Runs in the family.
If you think climate change is bad now wait until our aerosol hairspray usage goes up 5000%
A little Sunday Programming Humor
I don’t remember Yosemite Sam saying anything like this…
I asked my English teacher where the last name Smith came from
"Well," he said, "in the past family names were often descriptive. People who forged iron for a living were called smiths, so that eventually led to the last name Smith." 'Is that where names likes Fisher come from too?' I asked. "Yes," he replied, "that's exactly where they come from." 'Thank-you,' I gushed, 'you're the best teacher ever Mr. Dickinson!'
When you die, which part of the body is the last one to stop working?
The pupils. They dilate
what the actual fuck.
You gotta keep ‘em separated
Why did the beaver suddenly quit work?
Because he hated his dam job.
Why are people with foot fetish losers?
Because they like to taste defeat.
Always use dark mode!
Math is hard
Come now, Private Eye, I thought you better than trite boomerism.
70,000 fewer deaths if literally anyone else was President
Interviewer: “Describe yourself in three words.”
Seen this beauty at Walmart
oh god oh fuck
Sorry next generation, previous generation told current generation it was okay..
I don’t like Civil War jokes
I General Lee don’t find them funny
What’s the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman?
One is a superhero, the other is a command.
My mom was telling dadjokes
Why are photographers so hesitant to get into a relationship?
They're interested in developing one, but can't stop focusing on all the negatives.
Haha many hands funny
Her (On Tinder): I’m a model on Instagram! What do you do?
Him: I'm a soldier, on Call of Duty.
Have we gone too far
Did you hear about the new restaurant on the mars?
The food is great but there’s not much atmosphere.
Someday, Ahmed, someday…
VsCode is watching you.
Oh, poor Ed!
this is fucking gross
Does this creepy lighter that I found in an antique shop today count as Boomer Humor?
Fucken boomers man. Or GenXrs. I honestly don’t know anymore.
This meme might make so many people sad.
they don’t understand
Not only did someone post this on Facebook, they reposted it again. Boomer- 100