Yup, we have been bamboozled.
I recently took a pole and 100% of the people…
…were upset when their tent collapsed
Bouncer: “I’m going to have to ask you to leave
Me: "Why?" Bouncer: "I don’t know you, and This is my trampoline."
I got a job grooming police horses
I hate working with the fuzz… But it's a stable job.
I like my women like I like my slaves
Educated and free.
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan?
Because it has no home button.
My son is so ungrateful,
I bought him a new trampoline for Christmas but all he wants to do is sit in his wheelchair and cry.
At first, I wasn’t so sure about keeping a beard, but
It has grown on me
The Wood Glue I just bought doesn’t stick.
I guess I got the wouldn't glue instead.
Every morning for the past six months, I announce loudly to my family that I’m going for a jog, and then I don’t.
It’s my longest running joke of this year.
Never date an apostrophe.
They're too possessive.
![[NSFW] Too many men, very less time!](https://jokejet.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/010dqvpm9xh31-400x385.jpg)
Billy’s mom comes home. “Billy, what’s wrong?” -“Dad hanged himself in the attic!” he said in tears.
The mother rushes to the attic in a panic, quickly followed by her son. As she gets up to the attic, she notices that nothing is there, and little Billy started giggling. HaHaHa! April fool's mommy!!! He hanged himself in the basement!"
A Roman walks into a bar.
He sits down, holds up 2 fingers and says, “Five beers please.”
I plant my herbs in alphabetical order
You might ask how i find the time It's easy it's right there next to the sage
A slice of apple pie is $2.50 in Jamaica and $3.00 in the Bahamas.
Those are the pie rates of the Caribbean
A son walks in on his parents having sex NSFW
The parents see the boy and he runs off to his room. The mother puts on her robe and goes into the boys room The boy ask his mother what she was doing. “You know how daddy has a big stomach? Sometimes mummy has to get on top of daddy and flatten it.” “You’re wasting your time” says the boy. The mother confused asks “what do you mean?” “Well when you go to the supermarket the woman next door comes over and blows him back up.”
What do you call a police officer in bed?
An undercover cop.
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?
Because it was well armed.
I dig, You dig, He digs, She digs, We dig, They dig.
Its not a long poem but its very deep
We all know where the Big Apple is…
But does anyone know where the Minneapolis Edit: some of us don't spend our lives on r/jokes and as such don't realise things are reposts.
What did Obi-Wan say to Luke at the dinner table?
"Use the fork Luke"
Have you heard about that guy who got his left hand cut?
He's alright now
Son asks his father what a Vagina looks like.
Father: Before or after sex? Son: I don't know what that means? Father: Well there are two different types Son: Umm, before sex. Father: Oh well it looks like an Orchid at dawn just as the sun hits it, with dew drops on it, in a Botanical garden in Spring. Son: Oh woah. What does it look like after sex? Father: It looks like a bulldog just ate a jar of mayonnaise.
The self-cannibal at work got into trouble for making fun of me.
He really put his foot in his mouth.
I got a picture of myself in a locket for my 18th birthday.
I am now independent.
Idea
Could the r/dankmemes reddit be banning non europeans just as a dank meme?
I had the best Dad moment last night… *actual conversation with my 8 year old*
Son: Dad… how many kidneys do I have? Me: Two. You have two, son. Son: Nope… I have four. point to belly Two kidneys here… points to legs …and two kid knees here! The student has become the teacher.
